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Tuesday, March 13, 2007
March and the Mustache thereof

yes i know its been a while...

now that that is out of the way i wanted to talk a little bit about a part of the mens body that, if lucky, is fertile enough to grow some of the richest, fullest hair a man could ask for... this area is of course the upper lip. my upper lip is currently on day 13 of my mustache endeavor... i thought i would compile a list that only a mustache owner or enthusiast could appreciate... those of you who can relate then feel free to chuckle... the rest of you... feel free to burn with envy..

things mustaches are good for:

  • dazzling additions to already stunning upperlips.
  • upper lip hiders
  • nose scratcher
  • if you close your eyes and lay on your arm just right, it feels as if one of the manliest men ever recorded is snuggling with you.
  • woman deterrent
  • woman attractant
  • its one of the two sides of velcro.... depends on the length.
  • tounge cleaner
  • crum compartant(s)
  • one of the main parts of a porn star costume
  • one of the main parts of a child molestor costume
  • one more thing men can hold above womens heads, since their smaller brains arent quite capable of thinking up how to train the upper lips to be fierce like mustache tigers.... and the women that can, are usually frowned upon.
  • conversation piece
  • best friend

this list could go on and on however there are somethings that require the secret mustache handshake to even speak about so ill just leave it at that....


ps...if you are wondering... yes there is something over there out of frame that i am looking at that was deserving of a sternly cool gaze

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