Dearest United Nations,
Although you are Zionist pigs or the friends of Zionist pigs, we implore you to help Lebanon, Hezbollah and our many terrorist friends, terrorist government officials and terrorist leaders from the evil Israel empire. Just because we have continually threatened, killed and terrorized the people of Israel over the years, we see no need for you to allow them to bully us. Sure some may say that we have brought this on ourselves. Many a day I have laughed and chuckled at the several innocent Israli civilians that we (through the guise of our many terrorist organizations) have killed. I'm sure that the rest of the world (who will die a pigs death) realizes how much of a sweet, peaceful Muslim country we are. If they don't know now, then that is only because we haven't been able to murder their innocent civilians in the name of allah, but we will. That is unless you allow the Israelis to wipe us off the face of the planet. What good will that do? Bring the middle east one more step closer to peace? What is peace? Peace is just a reason for us to murder innocent infidels!!!
I digress, please pass sanctions that will make sure that Hezbollah, Lebanon and all the terrorists therein may continue to murder as may infidels as we want. If you allow Israel to completely wipe us off the planet, then surely allah will punish you. I think... Well, allah shall give us the power to deflect and destroy the Israeli army!! They do not know who they are fighting.
Sincerely,
Abu ban habudabi
p.s. Please don't let Israel hurt us! Allah will destroy them! But just in case, please don't let Israel hurt us!
