It has been a joy in the past as others have offered guest posts. It now is my pleasure to offer one by a gentleman from the office...big D. It seems he may have similar feelings as we Convoginators ... see for yourself:
I have come to a very important time in my life and I feel I have to make some very important decisions as to my future and place in this world.
The recent discussions on this and other boards have made my decision much easier. I am now confident there are many people out there that are willing to assume my responsibility to society and family. Therefore, I have decided to rid myself of all personal responsibility as I believe it will make my life much easier, more enjoyable and carefree.
I've decided to quit my job and move to the country. I'm going out tonight and pitch a tent on the nice smooth flat shoulder along the side of Interstate 30….It is public land. I'm going to party and live it up out there and do whatever I like. No responsibility, no schedule, complete freedom to do as I please.
I have always wanted to live my life in this manner, but have not had the financial means
necessary to accomplish these goals, however; I have finally realized the only thing keeping me from my goal was responsibility.
Some have questioned my decision to locate next to a busy interstate, but I have carefully considered the location and believe it to be the best place to provide for my needs. I love the smells and sounds of the open road, and I'm sure I will have several visitors a day drop in to check on me. If I am thirsty, a well placed sign will get me all the water I need. If I am hungry, an "I need food" sign will provide me with more food than I could possibly eat. I can create a sign for any of my needs and the good motorists will oblige. Some have expressed concern about the heavy automobile and truck traffic and I am pleased to say that a local contractor has graciously given me 12 slightly used, not so bright orange traffic cones to warn motorists of my presence.
In the unlikely event a "disaster" should befall me out there such as a severe thunderstorm, high winds, hail, tornado, ice storm, fire, flood, severe heat and drought, extreme cold, and the remote possibility I will be crushed by 18 wheelers, I will be located at the 205 mile marker. Should a "disaster" strike, someone must assume responsibility for my safety and well being as I have previously absolved myself of all personal responsibility. My source of food and water might not be available if it is a large "disaster" or my injuries may prevent me from being able to set out the appropriate sign
assuming they were not destroyed in the "disaster". If they are destroyed, I will need new ones since they are the only means I have to secure necessary water and food. Without these signs I will surely suffer an agonizing and painful death. Someone must notify GW because surely my cell phone service will be cancelled for non payment after a few months or will be destroyed by the disaster itself, and I will have no means of communication with authorities.
Please do not delay in calling; I might not be dead, just severely wounded and need emergency care and supplies. In the event I am fortunate enough to escape serious injury, I will more than likely need a new tent and necessary supplies to replace those that were damaged as a result of the unlikely "disaster". The traffic cones may also need to be replaced with brighter new ones. Should I become disabled as a result of this unlikely "disaster", I will need extensive rehab and medical care and someone to feed, take care of and train my dogs for an extended period of time depending on the severity of my injuries.
If I should succumb to the unlikely "disaster" I will forever blame GW. Someone please remind GW it is his and the Federal Government's responsibility to provide for funeral arrangements and take care of my wife, kids and dogs, as they did not have the forethought, wisdom, motivation or means to move out there with me and I assume are still very much alive and in desperate need of assistance. They would greatly appreciate a $2000.00 debit card. Feel free to give them mine as well as I will have little use for it.
Ahhhhhh…….The joys of freedom from responsibility sure make a man feel good. Knowing what I know now, my only regret is that I didn't do this 35 years ago.
Thanks to the many liberal, left wing, GW haters that have given me the strength and courage to reach for my goals; you will not be forgotten…..especially in the event of an unlikely "disaster".
Phynerk
