Well, I got my initial training for me new job today. First, you take the squirrel and tie a sparkler to its tail. (no ordinary sparkler will do, it has to be a high quality one, otherwise the squirrel will fizzle out early.) After you attach the sparkler to the squirrel, ignite the sparkler with one hand and propel it toward someone with the other. This is important, because once you light it, you want it to have somewhere to go. Step three: stand out of the way and laugh. All that, and I get paid too...
Seriously, I've got some covignating to do as of right now...
