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Thursday, December 29, 2005
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I think we need a convoginator's air service!
I believe that this or this would suffice. We could work the border on off days. If we had to, I guess we could settle for this ...
manteca
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
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You could say I've been busy...
but that might be an understatement.
 This represents approximately the last month and a half. The darker lines represent at least three flights. Speaking of busy, since I know the rest of you aren't. When are we going to have a convoginators new year's extravaganza... Jeff C.
Thursday, December 22, 2005
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Bringin' the Bling to Christmas
So this year P-Diddy's clothing lines sales were not as high as expected. So the crew came up with a last minute idea to roll in some green before the holidays.
Introducing the Pimp Daddy Nutcracker Line!
That's right, Christmas is all up in this Hizzle Biotches!!!
The Face of Crazy
"and then I will take the little gnomes that live in my beard, and we will beat you senseless...then we will make 12 pairs of shoes...becuase that will be pleasing to allah! May I have a cracker? Don't make me shoot you with the laser in my finger! Now I want a cracker and a Fresca...wait...what? Oh, and the gnomes would like some skittles! So, a cracker, a Fresca, some skittles..fine! Tropical skittles...or you get the finger laser!"
Sunday, December 18, 2005
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I didn't mean to turn you on.
No discussion of women and marriage would be truly complete without talking frankly about the "S" word….that's right; SEX. As we've seen, men and women are just plain different. The differences go much further than our physical make up but also to those things that would arouse men and women. The 1982 Nobel prize-winning psychologist, Dr. Herman Von Schmidlap probably summed this up best when he said, "Wie du schon weißt, war Jim drei Wochen lang in Asien auf Geschäftsreise. Da musste ich hier zu Hause fast alles machen und kam nie dazu, dir zu schreiben."
This factor of men/women relationships is extremely complex. The following illustration sums up quite nicely the stimuli-to-arousal differences between men and women.
Phynerk
Friday, December 16, 2005
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SUPERTROOPER
 Josh "Sanchez" Daugherty
Vermont State Trooper Josh Daugherty
Josh "Umberto Panini" Daugherty
Please send in your captions! Those are the first ones that came to my mind. Thank goodness Josh shaved this monkey off soon after the picture.
manteca
Women.....handle with caution !
Dealing with females can be very tricky. This fact has not escaped the United States government. OSHA ( Occupational Safety and Hopelessly Asinine ) recently published methods of treating females safely in the same manner one would work with hazardous materials. This is no joke.
Phynerk
Thursday, December 15, 2005
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Everything......women - part 2
Women seem to change from the dating phase and into the marriage phase.
This phenomenon can be readily seen from the graph below. Trust me, this thing
is VERY accurate.
Phynerk
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
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Everthing you need to know about...WOMEN
After 34.5 years of wedlock I feel I know a little about women. In the next several episodes I will endeavor to share scientific, statistical, empirical, and otherwise bogus information for our young single Convoginators. I believe it will better equip some of these young men to grapple with many of the mysterious factors which have caused men to ask , "Huh????" for the millennia. These installments will also ( hopefully ) keep the fires fanned for others to get off their "busy" bottoms AND POST !!!
Phynerk
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
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Death comes in many forms...
The end is near for Tookie Williams. At 12:01 AM (PST), Tookie Williams will be put to death by lethal injection at San Quintin prison. On Saturday, December 10, 2005 Richard Pryor passed away due to a heart attack. Both of these black Americans have been written about heavily over the past 3 days. I have found several articles about their impact on black culture in the United States. Stanley Crouch wrote an excellent article concerning the ill effects of Richard Pryor's comedy on American culture. I really respect the writings of Stanley Crouch, I mean come on, he has written more Wynton Marsalis liner notes than I can shake a stick at. He is also a co-founder of the Jazz at Lincoln Center department. As for Tookie Williams, well, every article I read that is in support of his life inprisonment, comments on his self redemption by speaking out against violence and writing children's books on the evils of gang life.
I am by no means comparing Richard Pryor to Tookie Williams. Talk about apples and oranges. One is a convicted murderer and the other a famous comedian and actor. I am very interested in the portrayal of these two men in the media and in the minds of their supporters and opponents. As Stanley Crouch points out the vulgarity and racial degeneration that Pryor created with his real life comedy, several actors, superstar rappers and Jesse Jackson defend a man who murdered 4 people and helped create one of the deadliest street gangs in the United States. In fact, several times, Tookie Williams was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize by a Swiss Legilator, college professors and others. Many of Tookie's supporters say that executing him will send the wrong message. I wonder what that message will be? It seems that after 26 years, the messag to the families of the dead is that there is justice in the world.
Richard Pryor has always made me laugh. I know that his stand up was vulgar and his reference to black Americans was in itself insulting to his race. Every movie of his that I have seen, from "Superman III" to "The Toy" has made me laugh. The movie "Hear No Evil, See No Evil," with Gene Wilder is one of my favorites. Yeah, I know, many say that is a terrible movie, but I believe the comedy in that movie and the interaction between Pryor and WIlder is amazing, much like in their other films together, "Silver Streak" and "Stir Crazy."
So in the death of these two men, we see two sides of the coin. The actor, comedian, writer gets the worst of it. The articles are written about his junkie habits of the late 70's, his accident with setting himself on fire and his decadent abuse of his racial history. Never mentioned is the fact that after visiting Africa in the 1979, he never once used the "N" word again in reference to his black heritage. His REDEMPTION wasn't great enough to warrant a Nobel Peace Prize nomination. His tireless work to stop animal abuse around the world wasn't enough, his numerous awards and achievements weren't enough either. Nope, they just mention his shortcomings and flash his picture on the screen. Tookie on the other hand gets candlelight vigils and star endorsements. He even gets this from the NAACP..."Too often I hear the governor and many who are around him talk about his values system," said NAACP President Bruce S. Gordon. "In this particular case, those values seem to be cast aside. There is absolutely no recognition given to redemption." I think that last line says it all. "There is absolutely no recognition given to redemption." It looks like to some, sitting on death row for 26 years and finally "coming around," decrees redemption and honor.
Why did I write this? Mainly to get my own confusion concerning the treatment of these two men by the media out of my brain and onto "digital" paper. This is just my opinion, and I placed it here, well, because I can. Let me know what you think...or not. The 22 people who read this blog each day might have a better take on it than I do.
manteca
Sunday, December 11, 2005
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Funny, Funny Man!
Richard Pryor
December 1, 1904 - December 10, 2005manteca
Thursday, December 08, 2005
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Tookie, tookie...Josh knows....
So Tookie Wiliams is getting his clemency hearing... Unfortunately for him, Arnie is the man who makes the decision. If Tookie can make it through the "airing of grievances," "the feats of strength," and pin Conan, then it WILL BE a Festivus Miracle.
 
TWO MEN ENTER...ONE MAN LEAVES!!
manteca
Monday, December 05, 2005
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Poor Sam is Dead
Seems he caught sight of his reflection in a window..
Phynerk
Sunday, December 04, 2005
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Ray Nagin and his 15 minutes
Mayor Nagin, do you hear that? That's the warning siren for the end of your 15 minutes. The BIG question for the BIG Easy...will you turn that 15 minutes into a lifetime? I wonder if he realizes that this opportunity that has dropped into his lap, via a disastrous tragedy, is his big ticket? Maybe he just wants to be a mayor and that's all he ever aspired too. His chance has arrived. He could parlay this thing into a history book moment if he has the moxie and the intelligence. I personally believe he doesn't have the intelligence to pull it off. He has moxie, but no more than that of a bum who stops every pedestrian and asks for money.
Mayor Nagin has been speaking at town hall meetings this past week. He spoke in Houston and Memphis and finished up in Atlanta at Morehouse College. See, Morehouse college...he is attempting to enhance his image among minorities. At least he or most likely his PR person or trusted aide had the insight to book him at Morehouse. Unfortunately, he ran into some hard questions.
"I'm waiting for some direction from City Hall. I'm looking for a simple, concise, progressive, consistent message. That's what I'm waiting for," he said. "I feel that, after three months, we ought to be in the progression of a plan." - New Orleans Resident
Mayor Nagin is handicapped by the fact that his city is still run by incompetent leaders. They are still spewing the same old MIS-information that has plagued them since the "10, 000 dead" scenarios right after the hurricane. Oh Mary Landrieu, where are you now?
I wonder what is happening in Biloxi and Gulfport? I hear nothing about those large cities and how their people are making out. I would guess those people weren't waiting for help, rolled their sleeves up and got down to cleaning up the mess and moving on. Then again, they could be watching for the trailer and waiting for the check...New Orleans style.
My vote for the old tattoo parlor...day spa for pets.
manteca
Friday, December 02, 2005
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SAY IT AIN'T SO !!!!!!!
To say I was surprised would not be correct. To say I was utterly destroyed and crushed within would only begin to convey the internal struggle of spirit, soul and body. To say that all hope was ever lost for fulfillment is getting close. To say I was pretty 'poopie' hits the nail on the head. Yes, today I noticed that one of Hopes landmarks is no longer a reality. A place I had come to use on many occasions; a bastion of civility and culture is no more. You ask, whats he talking about ???? Listen, don't you ever get out ? Is your head forever stuck in the sand ? Are you from Hope ? Yes, ( I say this with a tear in both eyes ) the Black Sheep Ink Tattoo parlor near Brookshires went belly up ( probably with plenty of navel rings too boot ). I mean, WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO ???? What is the deal ??? So now for all my piercing needs I'll be forced to drive all the way to Texarkana. You know, it was so convenient, on any whim, to simply drive a short 5 minutes to get a nose ring or an extra ear bob; not to mention a little butterfly right above the old butt crack. Oh well, now what ? Given the "creativity" of the average Hope-ite we can only expect another smoke shop, car parts place, or Mexican restaurant. Wouldnt it be nice for some forward-thinking avant-gard person to step up to the challenge and make something great out of that property? For instance, what about the Manteca Sound Recording Studio, or Websites-to-go-by-Josh ? What about the Kiss Me, I'm Irish Coffee Shop and Poetry Reading Room ( where it's OK to be gay-ish). I wouldnt mind the idea of our own Poop-Are-Us by eRIc or even Kyle's Charm School. Hey, whadaya say, put some of your own desires on the tag board and maybe if were lucky some big-city entrepreneur will take the ball and run with a good idea....Lord knows our town could use one
Ph ynerk
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