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Tuesday, May 31, 2005
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
The French say "NON!"

HMMM.... there sure are alot of RED states...ummm...provinces there...they must be Republican.
Who knew?? So I guess French inbreeding isn't so bad afterall!



jour ayez bon freakin '
manteca



On Health and Insurance...

I received a phone call in the wee hours of the morning which subsequently resulted in my waking up at 10:00. My mother was quite concerned as my health insurance was expiring quite unexpectedly in Arkansas, and it would be a full two weeks before coverage could be restored. I'm usually not one to dwell on this type of conundrum, but I am a firm believer in Murphy's Law and the lack of insurance would almost require that some horrible malady befall me. I digress, I had to Corolla on down to the local Blue Cross and Blue Shield and get a short term health policy. Instead of letting me fill out the application, the secretary had to do so herself. Amazingly, she managed to mispell "Flight Instructor" and at that point I realized I should have just answered "Teacher" when she asked my profession. "Slacker" would also have been highly appropriate, but we'll not go there at this juncture.

So now I have health insurance, except for a one-minute window tomorrow morning from 12:00 A.M. to 12:01 A.M. Isn't that just the damndest thing?

Off to "work"
Jeff C.

I miss my seashell...

Sunday, May 29, 2005
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Outlook Tasks Macro

Yo guys. I'm not sure how many of you use Tasks in Outlook but if you do you might find this useful. I created a macro that helps manage completed tasks. Here's the blog with the code.

Later,
Kyle

Friday, May 27, 2005
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
It is I...

I now realize that I am the "Someone" that Phynerk is referring too. I feel terrible...

I have an excuse...here a few (pick one)

magnetic interferance from money/credit cards
dry joints on cable plug
we're waiting for [the phone company] to fix that line
sounds like a Windows problem, try calling Microsoft support
temporary routing anomoly
somebody was calculating pi on the server
fat electrons in the lines
excess surge protection
floating point processor overflow
divide-by-zero error
POSIX complience problem
monitor resolution too high
improperly oriented keyboard
network packets travelling uphill
Decreasing electron flux
We had a break in a network line and ones and zeros filled the office


So know I must find those drivers and burn them to a disc... or Feyd will get me (and you don't want to see Sting get in his pissed off Dune mode)




manteca


Thursday, May 26, 2005
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Woulda,Coulda,Shoulda

I wish to apologize to the Convoginator family for all the videos that I have NOT posted. I'm getting ahead of myself though. This Christmas Matthew gave me and Mrs. Phynerk a great-honkin' video camera. I got it out and immediately produced two epic short documentaries. One on the results of the Monty Python trivia contest; the other on the Roots of Convogination. At that time I was promised by "someone" to get the necessary drivers to be able to continue using our camera with a better movie-making program. So far I have not received these drivers. This is the reason for this post. I go on record that the following videos have been either cancelled or postponed until the drivers materialize:
1) CaraP's Belmont concert
2) Mrs. Phynerk's graduation
3) The Madlock Pool Cleaning Party
4) Matthew wetting himself on being late for the first showing of the new Star Wars movie
5) A real Elvis sighting
6) eRIc fixing a flat with only a lock of his hair
7) Jeff C riding in a taxi
If anyone is as sorry as I for these unfortunate cancellations and you may know of the whereabouts of the necessary drivers I need or the "someone" who hasn't come through with them…..HELP!!



Phynerk

Throw me somethin' mistuh !!!!

Way to go Mrs. Phynerk !!!!



Isn't she pretty ???



Phynerk

Tuesday, May 24, 2005
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Phynerk...Is this the machine you speak of?

I think this may be the machine that Phynerk is describing...



If not...then I have no idea what he is talking about. OK...we all know I have no idea what he is talking about.

manteca

Any post Matthew can post, I can post longer

You know us old poots ( like me) get frustrated with all the techno babble of you young 'gamers'. I thought you would, however ,
be interesed in a process I have been intimately involved with over the last few months which I will be starting up in just a week.
I hope it will not be too low-tech for you all. It's the best I can do with what my old life throws at me.


For a number of years now, work has has been proceeding in order to bring
prefection to the crudely conceived idea of a machine that would work to not
only supply inverse reactive current, for use in unilateral phase detectors, but
would also be capable of automatically synchronising cardinal grammeters. Such
a machine is the 'Turboencabulator'. Basically, the only new principle involved
is that instead of the power being generated by the relaxive motion of
conductors and fluxes, it is produced by the modial interactions of magneto-
reluctance and capacitive directance.

The original machine had a base-plate of prefabulated amulite, surrounded by a
malleable logarithmic casing in such a way that the two spurving bearings were
in direct line with the pentametric fan, the latter consisted simply of six
hydrocoptic marzelvanes, so fitted to the ambifacient lunar vaneshaft that side
fumbling was effectively prevented. The main winding was of the normal lotus-
o-delta type placed in panendermic semiboloid slots in the stator, every seventh
conductor being connected by a non-reversible termic pipe to the differential
girdlespring on the 'up' end of the grammeter.

Forty-one manestically placed grouting brushes were arrranged to feed into the
rotor slip stream a mixture of high S-value phenyhydrobenzamine and 5 percent
reminative tetraiodohexamine. Both these liquids have specific pericosities
given by p=2.4 Cn where n is the diathecial evolute of retrograde temperature
phase disposition and C is the Chomondeley's annual grillage coefficient.
Initially, n was measured with the aid of a metapolar pilfrometer, but up to the
present date nothing has been found to equal the transcetental hopper dadoscope.

Electrical engineers will appreciate the difficulty of nubbing together a
regurgitative purwell and a superaminative wennel-sprocket. Indeed, this proved
to be a stumbling block to further development until, in 1943, it was found that
the use of anhydrous nagling pins enabled a kyptonastic boiling shim to be
tankered.

The early attempts to construct a sufficiently robust spiral decommutator failed
largely because of lack of appreciation of the large quasi-pietic stresses in
the gremlin studs; the latter were specially designed to hold the roffit bars to
the spamshaft. When, however, it was discovered that wending could be prevented
by the simple addition of teeth to socket, almost perfect running was secured.

The operating point is maintained as near as possible to the HF rem peak by
constantly fromaging the bituminous spandrels. This is a distinct advance on
the standard nivelsheave in that no drammock oil is required after the phase
detractors have remissed.

Undoubtedly, the turboencabulator has now reached a very high level of technical
development. It has been successfully used for operating nofer trunnions. In
addition, whenever a barescent skor motion is required, it may be employed in
conjunction with a drawn reciprocating dingle arm to reduce sinusoidal
depleneration.


Wish me luck next week.

Phynerk

I didn't want to have to do this...



This picture was NOT doctored in any way! Who's the DORK now?? Notice the girl in the back...SHE KNOWS WHO THE DORK IS!!

manteca

Leaving the Left

Keith Thompson's article that you really must read in its entirety,

Excerpt:

A turning point came at a dinner party on the day Ronald Reagan famously described the Soviet Union as the pre-eminent source of evil in the modern world. The general tenor of the evening was that Reagan's use of the word "evil" had moved the world closer to annihilation. There was a palpable sense that we might not make it to dessert.
When I casually offered that the surviving relatives of the more than 20 million people murdered on orders of Joseph Stalin might not find "evil'" too strong a word, the room took on a collective bemused smile of the sort you might expect if someone had casually mentioned taking up child molestation for sport.
My progressive companions had a point. It was rude to bring a word like "gulag" to the dinner table.

Monday, May 23, 2005
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is OUR house...

And you don't have to launch an unprovoked attack on one of your fellow posters just because they came up with a good idea before you did. Even if such a brilliant idea was half-heartedly executed, it was not grounds for an assault on my character and/or figure. I will admit, I chuckled at first, but then I had to ask myself what would cause someone to take immediate offense at someone else's use of photoshop. In an effort to put this behind us, I got a little childish and decided that I couldn't let my handsome face be dragged through the proverbial mud without some form of reply...

At first, I thought of simply turning my attention to Josh, since it was ultimately him that provided the means with which to attack me. It was all to easy to bring up which one of us is currently dating the hottest convoginator, and which one currently has an unhealthy obsession with Chewbacca.


Image hosted by Photobucket.com


But I realized, that Josh is just following orders. He's a worker bee, and I can't hold much against him because I have often used the defense that for some reason didn't work at the Nuremberg Trials. Also, there seemed to be bigger fish to fry. I therefore appropriately turned my attention towards the Ace of Spades.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com


That's how I roll...

Jeff C.

this is my house...

you don't come up in my house and disrespect me like that.




it is disputed as to whether or not I was once your protege, but now I am the master.

Hey at Least you are Flying!



NOW Shut you cake hole and bring me more peanuts...

The MCSE Training Continues...



Image hosted by Photobucket.com



Jeff C.

Console Wars Part 2- PS3

I will try and not be biased towards Sony. I will try to present their platform fairly.

CPU
  • Cell Processor- PowerPC-base Core @ 3.2GHz

  • 1 VMX vector unit per core

  • 512KB L2 cache

  • 7 x SPE @ 3.2GHz

  • 7 x 128b 128 SIMD GPRs

  • 7 x 256KB SRAM for SPE

Memory
  • 256MB XDR Main RAM @ 3.2GHz

  • 256MB GDDR3 VRAM @ 700MHz

GPU
  • RSX @ 550MHz- 1.8 TFLOPS floating point performance

  • Full HD (up to 1080p) x 2 channels

  • Multi-way programmable parallel floating point shader pipelines

I/O
  • USB Front x 4, Rear x 2 (USB2.0)

  • Memory Stick standard/Duo or PRO

  • SD standard and mini- CompactFlash (Type I, II)

Communications
  • Ethernet (10BASE-T, 100BASE-TX, 1000BASE-T) x 3 (input x 1 + output x 2)

  • Wi-Fi IEEE 802.11 b/g

  • Bluetooth 2.0 (EDR)


Alright, i want to say, "WOW!" 3 gigabit ports. Bluetooth and 6 USB. "WHY?"

Sony showed some amazing demos at their conference which included physics demos, 128bit color depth, and effects demos. They showed old Final Fantasy VI CG done in real time, which was pretty amazing. I was most impressed with Final Night Round 3.

Quite amazing detail.

But this is when the show went downhill. They should alot of trailers for upcoming games. They tauted this footage as 'in-game' graphics. The peeps at the conference immediately seperated into 2 camps: The ones who believed that it was real time and the others that believed that it was CG. I will try and clarify the differnece. CG (computer graphics) is what Toy Story is. It is a bunch of people working on graphics that have to be renedered over a course of years in a computer. Real time is what Halo 2 is. It is renedered at the moment real time. When Sony showed the Unreal Engine and the Final Night Round 3 they purposely proved to the audience that it was real time by moving the camera around. They neglected to tell people that the footage that they were about to see was CG. Alot of people at the conference took the footage as proof that the PS3 was 'OMG-LOL- ROFLMAO" better then XBOX. The media picked it up and ran with it. This was underhanded. Sony starts out its conference by stating that the PS3 is twice as powerful as Xbox 360. So when you see CG tauted as real time, you tend to believe it. This type of propaganda is really jsut a replay of the past.

When PS2 was going to be released, the gamers and the media were braged with stories like this.

SOURCE

I will pull a couple of quotes out of this story.

Reportedly capable of pushing graphics nearly 50 times faster than the Dreamcast, the PlayStation 2 will handle DVD movies, music, and the next generation of video games.
Successor to the world's biggest-selling 32-bit game console is to feature a microprocessor co-developed with Toshiba Corp. (6502) that provides motion picture-quality images.

We all know this to be completely false. The dreamcast had and has games that look way better then PS2. Sony also claimed the ps2 could push 70 million polygons, and showed the namco girl tech demo which was 70 million polygons in all of its pre-rendered cgi glory. The PS2 comes out and maxes at 8 million polygons at most.

Great Blog on this

This guy really sums it up.

Microsoft and their business partners had real-time, in-engine displays for the public of Gears of War, Kameo, Ghost Recon 3, Full Auto, Condemned, Dog Tag, Need for Speed: Most Wanted, Quake IV, Dead or Alive 4, Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion, Tony Hawks American Wasteland, Top Spin 2, Project Gotham Racing 3, Call of Duty 2, and a handful of other titles as well. Behind closed doors, the press was shown a recent build of Perfect Dark Zero that wowed both IGN and Gamespot That's 15 titles right there, and Microsoft announced anywhere from 25-40 games will be available within the launch window of Xbox 360 (thats a 3-month period extending from the day the console is on shelves). Xbox 360 has support from every major publisher in the world including: Electronic Arts, Square-Enix, Activision, UbiSoft, Capcom, Konami, Sega, Rockstar, Namco, Vivendi Universal, LucasArts, THQ, and many others.

Sonys press conference included real-time footage of exactly two games, both from partners who in all likelihood wont be making these games exclusively for PS3 (Electronic Arts and Atari): Fight Night Round 3, and Unreal Tournament 2007. To their credit, Sony has gotten some of their partners to announce some very cool sequels for the Playstation 3. Metal Gear Solid 4 and Devil May Cry 4 will both almost certainly be fun, blockbuster games when they are finally available and on store shelves... but once again, we havent seen any real, in-game footage of them, let alone information on what cool new gameplay elements they may bring to the table.

When you step back from all the hype and all the muscle-flexing over the hardware, and look at whats supposed to matter, the games, E3 was actually a much bigger success for Microsoft. This doesnt mean that Sonys hardware wasnt impressive. It doesnt mean that you cant speculate over how cool games on the Playstation 3 may look or play but the bare facts are that Sony really had very small portions of two actual, real-time games to show. Microsoft and their partners had close to 20 titles they could show. On top of that, they gained major ground in terms of publisher support, especially from Japanese game-makers.

The battle continues.

How big of an idiot can you be?

You know how I feel about actors, musicians and the entertainment community voicing their opinions about politics... Well, stupid 'ol Warren Beatty has decided he too must make a preverbial ass of himself. This guy has always rubbed me the wrong way. I truly have never viewed any of his movies that were worth a flip. The comments that bother me...
"And although I don't want to run for governor, I would do one hell of a lot better job than he's done," the 68-year-old actor said. "I could name you a lot of Democrats who would be so much better than I would, and maybe even a few Republicans." - He said Schwarzenegger, a former bodybuilder and star of "The Terminator" movies," was playing politics in a bid to prepare himself for a run for president. "It's not fooling anybody to be running around raising money from Wall Street, K Street and rich Republicans all over the country," he said. "We are not the governor's dumbbells."
Not fooling anybody...I wonder who the FOOL actually is. HEY WARREN, for Schwarzenegger to even have a flying monkeys chance at being president, Congress would have to pass an amendment to the U.S. Constitution allowing a foreign-born American to run for president. Three-fourths of the states would also have to ratify the amendment. I'm sure in the make-believe world of movie making, Darth Vader and Shrek could get that taken care of with no problems. Here in the real world it will probably take a few more intelligent men and women to make that "special effect" happen.

What a tool.


Warren Beatty for TOOL!


manteca


Saturday, May 21, 2005
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Does Anybody Really Know What Time it Is?

Well now, graduation last night was quite an experience for one young man. Young Raincheck recieved an honour unbeknownst to all other Hope High School Graduates of 2005. I believe some "props" are in order. I also believe the addition of Raincheck calls for a celebration. A Six Flags trip perhaps? Pool party? A big, chocolate cake? Poop shaping? Well folks, take your pick. All I know is there's a tremedous lack of things to do in Hope, and we, being the witty, intelligent, covoginationing folks we are should hold the ability to find something constructive (besides work and ranting) to do with our time.

Next order of business: Lately I have noticed something that really should have been easily noticed before because of the nature of the thing but was not because of the nature of my state of mind and so forth... Where was I? Oh yes, I am the only female in practically everything I do. Case in point: UCA Saxophone Studio, Experiment Station Horticulture Crew (except for the boss), Convoginators, and I could go on but won't because of the nature of this post. Anypoop, why do such things seem to be the case? What a question to ponder! I'm not complaining by any means, I just wonder why such things always seem to happen. The are numerous possible answers to such a question:

a. All the guys I hang around with are wusses.
b. I'm a bit too manly. (I could have previous suitemate syndrome.)
c. There are still some harmful chemicals hanging about the air from various wars.
d. All of the above.
e. None of the above.

I chose e. Not that it matters, and I don't know where I was going with that except maybe just to pass time until tomorrow when I must once again pass time until I GET to go to work Monday. Actually I'm just a little drunk. Or I wish I was drunk. No, no, it's because I have fluid in my ear probably also caused by one of the above answers. I need a pint!

Slainte!
seashell

Props to our newest member...

Graduation Friday night proved to be the preverbial nail in the coffin for the justification of inviting Raincheck into our midst. I believe the following picture will solidify his comic genius...



Here is a little closeup!

HAHAHAHA!! The guy is funny!

manteca

Props

Matthew's last post was the first post of his that i think ive read in its entirity, b/c normally his posts have page numbers and i get lost when something about something else is all the democrats fault...

anyways i just wanted to say that matthews last post was pretty dang well written. i read alot of game magazines, and ive been looking for info on the new 360 alot here lately and that is the best thing ive read by far. you freaking stud.

i was gonna write props in the tagboard, but then i thought that id just use my convoga-membership card to put it on the real deal.

(oh by the way, i made membership cards)
(they're in the mail...dont worry)

Friday, May 20, 2005
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cosole Wars Part One - M$

M$ has released game footage and specs for their new machine. I am thoroughly impressed.

Here are the specs as of now.
CPU
  • Three symmetrical cores running at 3.2 GHz each

  • Two hardware threads per core; six hardware threads total

  • VMX-128 vector unit per core; three total

  • 128 VMX-128 registers per hardware thread

  • 1 MB L2 cache

Ram
  • 512 MB of 700 MHz GDDR3 RAM

  • Unified memory architecture
  • >

I/O
  • Support for up to four wireless game controllers

  • Three USB 2.0 ports

  • Two memory unit slots

Digital Media Support
  • Support for DVD-Video, DVD-ROM, DVD-R/RW, DVD+R/RW, CD-DA, CD-ROM, CD-R, CD-RW, WMA CD, MP3 CD, JPEG Photo CD

  • Ability to stream media from portable music devices, digital cameras and Windows XP-based PCs

  • Ability to rip music to the Xbox 360 hard drive

(Yes you can hook up your IPOD and make play lists on your XBOX)
HD Support
  • All games supported at 16:9, 720p, and 1080i, anti-aliasing

  • Standard-definition and high-definition video output supported

Audio
  • Multi-channel surround sound output

  • Supports 48 KHz 16-bit audio

  • 320 independent decompression channels

  • 32-bit audio processing

  • Over 256 audio channels


I left the graphics chip for last since there is so much debate concerning the GPU. Their website actually states wrong figures concerning the chip. ATI is making the chip for M$, and it is a doozy. It has broken new ground and the tech for this card will not be released for PC until the end of 2006 or 2007. It has added a little 10MB EDRAM that sits right next to the GPU. It will use this little bit of space for most calculations. The effective bandwidth between the the GPU and the EDRAM is what is exciting. It is 256 GB/s (Yes Gigabytes per sec). This solves the bottlenecks that all graphics cards have right now. It is patented and not available or will ever be available to PC's. It was designed for 1280*1024*32 with 4x FSAA. For those who know this number it should excite you. The card can do 2X and 4x anti-aliasing for "free" because of this 10MB EDRAM. This is going to make HD gaming amazing.
I have trolled geeky 3d card forums studying about the new technology and everyone is in agreement; it is amazing.

When XBOX 1 released the parts were not that great. The GPU was a little exciting becauseit had a unified shading architect which allowed the shadows to be done hardware and not software. But the CPU was a 733 MHz processor; And the RAM was sup bar. At the time the best computer was a 1.4 Pentium 3 and a Geforce card that was better then XBOX GPU. But now is a much different story. The firstmulti core CPU for the desktop is not going to be out until the end of the year and they only handle on thread at a time. Realistically this computer can't be built until the middle of 2007 or beginning of 2008. The talks of triple core CPU's is just now starting in the community. and as for the RAM on the XBOX 360, it is the same RAM that graphics cards use. It is the fastest. This will never happen on a PC (which is good is most cases). And the GPU is a marvel. It is supposed to be (figures are still coming out about it) 4 times more powerful then the next ATI card.

All these numbers are theoretical, but effective numbers are starting to surface.

Tomorrow PS3.
The amazing Cell processor, but the way overhyped GPU (The 360's GPU IS more powerful, the media is just going to have to catch up)

Here is some great debate on the GPU

Thread 1
Thread 2
Thread 3

One Pic to get you thinking on the Next Gen. This is NOT CGI, It is running on a Xbox 360 alphp dev kit (which is a dual processor G5 with a x850xt and 512 megs of DDR. 30% of the XBOX 360) in game.


The New York Times is worse than any tyrant...

I have to post yet again in response to the New York TIme's Article concerning atrocities at a prison in Afghanistan. I think it is sad when a liberal dirt rag like the NYT believes that its sole purpose is to trash Americans and the US Army. We entered this war to save people. To stop the senseless murdering of innocent people. Not for oil, not for money, heck, nor even for power. If that was true, I wouldn't be paying $2.15/gallon for gasoline, and my "Money from the Iraq War" check would be coming regularlyto my mail box. I truly believe that this war is historical not only in the worldly sense, but biblically. Anyway, Idigress... The NYT and other liberal rags constantly bash their own country. Look what Newsweek published. I think Mrs. Bush said it best "...it was irresponsible." I think the First Lady was correct, but she left out one fine point. It is traitorous. The fact that these rags continually attempt to make the US military look as evil as the terrorists that they are attempting to stop is horrendous. I know free speech is one of our basic rights, but geez,aren't we taking a bit far? The NYT and other members of the "Save a Dolphin Society for the Prevention of Human Existence" really want us to look as bad as Saddam's son's Uday and ImGay. The only conclusion that I can come to is that either these liberal rags are owned by either the wealthy muslim oil barons or run by actual radical muslim extremist. Either way, this kind of bashing is ridiculous. Did we learn nothing from the traitor Jane Fonda and the Vietnam war? These men and women are doing their duty. Yes, humans make mistakes. Look at Ted Kennedy's parents...he is a mistake. Even the great drunken sot Ted Kennedy has made mistakes...killing a woman and being analcoholic moron (give me a call Ted and we can debate this).

Do me a favor, boycott the New York Slimes and encourage all friends and relations to do the same.

manteca

Boy Would I Be Embarassed...

Remind me never to be a tyrant. When you are finally brought to justice, they take pictures of you in your prison "tighty whities," and post it all over the world!




manteca

Thursday, May 19, 2005
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tiger! Baby!

I'm in Springfield, MO visiting my cousin for the weekend. Actually, we're headed up to Kansas City, MO because a friend of mine is getting married, but that's beside the point. I've had the opportunity to provide some freelance technology services to Drury University. By that I mean my services were provided free... there was no lancing, however. I showed them how to run some cable in a half-ass method as to allow a workshop to take place, but not require much in the way of work, or resources. I also put ended two cables just to show that flying hadn't made me soft. Despite having no practice for nearly a year, I still managed to make it in under a minute. No redo's either.

I went with my cousin and his co-workers to see the latest Star Wars movie at midnight on Thursday. It was disturbing to see the numbers of people who thought it was necessary to dress up (not a coat and tie, mind you, but dressing up as a character from the movie.) We did have some fun at their expense, as I kept insisting to someone dressed up as Darth Maul that Captain James T. Kirk and Spock were going to make cameo appearances. You've never heard such nerd whining in your entire life (unless something of Matthew's gets stuck in a floppy drive.) It was a good movie, and just like eRIc I'm going to spoil something for you: Anikin becomes Darth Vader *gasp*

In other news, the G4 iBook is now running Tiger. Oh yeah, it kicks the proverbial ass! Manteca, you may find it necessary to dig up one of your macs... Well, I think I'm gonna call the woman and then go to bed, I'm tired...

Jeff C.

Down on Main Street

Alert! Alert!


Everyone get over to the
Book Nook NOW! Okay, not now because they're closed, but as soon as possible would be just great. Yeah... Anyhow, they've got this huge going out of business sale, and everything is 87.5 % off! Here is a short list of the fun you're missing out on that I now have: The Marble Faun, Beowulf, The Mentor Book of Short Plays, Five plays by Oscar Wilde, The Aeneid, The Amityville Horror, The Angel of Darkness, The Sum of All Fears, The Bear and the Dragon, The Death of a Nation, and Leadership Secrets of Attila the Hun. That's eleven books for six bucks! There was also a wealth of romance novels, historical and otherwise, but I'm afraid I had to pass. There wasn't much time, so obviously I didn't get much, but I'm going back tomorrow and possibly even Saturday if I need to. I suggest some folks join me. I'll be in the military section...

Slainte!
seashell

Howdy, Pardners....Yeeeee Haaaaaaa !!

Honestly I don't know why I put that stuff in my title since Dallas has as much to do with being cowboy as eRIc has to do with straight hair, or Matt has to do with short posts, or Manteca has to do with being a flaming liberal or Seashell not having her pint(s), or Jeff C. preferring Greyhound over American Airlines or…..well, you get the idea. In fact Dallas is just one big honkin' town filled with 1.6 billion people that, for some unknown reason, have chosen to live here !
I'm here with three other guys from the office. We are attending a software class on "Wonderware". Yes, Wonderware, not "Underware" or "Wonderbra" ( I say that to prevent anyone rushing to the Tag board to make some stupid crack about the name of the class….I beat you to it.) Our instructor is a guy from Venezwala with the thickest accent you ever heard. In fact after sitting in his class for the past three days, I can hear the echoes of his accent in my sleep. For example, I am using a PC with a weeeendows operating system. Somewhere in the PC you will find a booofer for data. And so on.
Tonight we all went to Bennihanas Steak house to eat. This is an unusual place indeed. It's a place where you go to pay to see someone other than your wife cook for you. And they don't cook, they perform - yes it's like a micro-circus act. There's nothing that will help your appetite more than to watch a Jap flip the cut-off tails from your shrimp into the top of his stovepipe chef's hat or spin an egg on the grill until it's hardboiled. You know, as much as I wanted to say something about Pearl Harbor and such I thought it might be best not to since this little Jap-chef guy had a knife so sharp it would probably cut kryptonite or even gold-pressed latnum. All in all it was a swell time. The food was really good except for the fact there was so much. The little Jap-chef guy that performed cooked for us basically threatened to use his knife on anyone who left any food behind. So I probably won't need to eat again until late June.
Well, this higher learning is all fine and good, but there's no place like a place called "home". I'll see ya'll there soon. Yippe-ki-yo. 'Yo



Phynerk

Don't say the Chinese didn't warn you...

So we got this cool new power supply tester...

It has some dire warnings on the back.
DON'T FORGET-->WILL BE DESTROY DEVICE!
BECAUSE:All Your Base Are Belong to Us!





manteca

Wednesday, May 18, 2005
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Finally got sucked in

So after a couple of years of saying how lame blogs are I have to say I've finally realized the power of the blog. And as such the crazy monkeys of convoginators have extended their invitation to let me join in the ongoing rants and raves that drive this crazy site.

So why have I decided Blogs are not as lame as I first thought. Well, of course because of the influence they had on the last election and how Kerry's blog helped him win the. . . oh wait what the hell am I talking about. The idea of using Blogs as a political engine was a complete flop. Ok, so why are these things cool again. Ok so the real reason is this. Since I started my new as a developer for a midsized consulting firm I use blogs as my number one resource for finding answers to my daily development questions. I would say 90% of my web browsing leads me to a blog post. And because of this I have started using various aggregators to subscribe to the blogs I come across, which currently stands as somewhere over 100.

It is amazing how powerful blogs have been in sharing knowledge within various communities on the net. I specifically search out knowledge around Software Development and general windows based business solutions, but the impact is obvious in almost any area you can think of. It's really a powerful thing when you think about it. I was actually having a conversation the other day with a guy that was talking about the social impacts of blogs and blog related technologies. Amazing to think that something as simple as an online journal can have such an impact.

And not only have I come full circle and actually enjoy reading blogs, I have recently created a community blog site, http://www.blogthis.org. The site is just starting out and I've not had much time to post on it yet, but maybe it will go somewhere. Any suggestions or fellow bloggers are welcome.

In closing just want to say thanks for inviting me and I hope I can contribute in some way to the convogination.

Later,
K


(ok, why the hell doesn't blogger.com's spell check recognize the word blog that's just freakin lame. . . )

Josh to the rescue...

I shall get onto drawing up some potential designs. FedEx is bringing my scanner tomorrow. Not that that fact has anything to do with me making designs. I just thought I might throw that out there. We might could take the rudimentary design from convoginoginators and fit it to our needs, or I could just go at it anew. I know how to use a photoshop tool that I didn't know about before (the pen...sounds so simple, yet i never knew it was there), so I'll redo the cow logo. But I'll tell you know that I'm not going to start on it before I've concluded my observances of the most holy day of May 19th.

<> works for blogger for bold (without the spaces of course)

Poop on a stick.

Well... its summer time... for me at least. In case its not summer for you, or your an adult and you just dont get a summer then... IN YOUR FACE HAHA!!!

now that thats out of the way, its time for more important things.

(imagine this being bold) Things we need to do as a group of convoginators excluding eRic, for eRic over the summer (/imagine the rest not being bold) (well... the rest isnt bold, so just imagine... poop on a stick)

1. Teach eRic how you do all these tricks using HTML such as making words bold, capitalizing the proper letters in words or phrases, or adding pictures.
2. Buy me either a dirtbike or a jet ski
3. Buy whichever you didnt already buy earlier on #2.
4. Drive back and forth between hope and conway on everyday that my mom cooks. (dont expect a tip)
5. Other stuff.


i got a little side tracked... when i went to preview my post i noticed that it looks much cooler in the preview than it actually does on the page, so Josh... make our page look like the preview... or just make it look cool... our site needs an update.


anyways, im in marion arkansas at the First Baptist Church listening to Lee Barnett teach people how to sing in unison.
this church is SUPER nice.

Some of you wierdo's may be happy to know that this post is coming from Mac G5, so if you need to lick this post or something, go ahead. But im sticking with my opinion that Mac's are gay... i wouldnt care if this was a G2Gillion, it would still pale in comparison to a PC.

My roommate brian is a manager at a movie theater in pine bluff, and Lucas Arts is paying him 50 dollars to put that new Star Wars movie together for his theater. I thought that was pretty funny. They asked for the best projectionist to handle the movie. I saw that movie last night when he put it together... im not trying to give it away or anything but... Anakin turns into Darth Vadar.... ooops.... well since i told you that i guess ill go ahead and tell you the rest...

So after Anakin goes to the dark side, he realizes he has NO black clothes, so what else is there to do?!?!?!

Starwars 3 and a half: ANAKIN GOES SHOPPING

but wait... after hours of ardurous shopping anakin realizes that none of the normal sized clothes fits him.

Starwars 3 and 3 quarters: A SLIGHTLY DEPRESSED ANAKIN REALIZES THAT HE NEEDS TO GO TO MERV'S BIG AND TALL STORE FOR MEN.


and thats where it happened. Anakin makes the transition to Darth Vader when he finds a long black cloak on the clearance rack for 60% off when you buy two, so he got one for his old man friend (i dont know that guys name, nor do i feel like googling starwars)

and thats how it ends... sorry if i ruined it for you... im sure i missed some parts of the movie that will be of some suprise, so all is not lost.

anyways...

that was retarded, but now choir practice is over, so im leaving....

Diversity is fine...

So long as it doesn't discrminate against Christianity.

rant

The Northwest Arkansas Times is reporting that a group wishes to bar the Promise Keepers from using the stadium at the University of Arkansas. Typical, how some liberals scream all day about being inclusive, and respecting the rights and beliefs of others, but when the rubber meets the road they want Christians to have no part of this so called "freedom."

According to Dick Bennett, retired professor of English and president of the OMNI center, that very mission speaks to the groups intolerance of others. "They are extremely exclusive in favor of Christianity to the exclusion of all the other religions," Bennett said. "This is a very fundamentalist, intolerant religious organization. Even though they say they are open to all denominations, ethnic and cultural backgrounds, they really mean if those different peoples will convert to
Christian," he said.


I've got news for you, Mr. Bennett. ALL religions really believe that they are the only way, the only true one. I don't care what rhetoric they spit out about inclusiveness, deep down they think the same thing. I don't hear you complaining about fundamentalist Muslims and how committed they are to "diversity"... but that was probably our fault too, wasn't it?

Those of you who are currently in an institution of higher education, or those that soon will be I hope you hold strong to your beliefs. Universitites are for the most part a bastion of liberal idealism and a stronghold of intolerance for conservative, Christian thought. Stand firm in your beliefs, but make sure you understand why you have them. Build your house on The Rock, and above all, don't give people like Mr. Bennett the time of day. Attention is all they really want.

/rant
Jeff C.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005
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SHE DONE IT !!!!!!

Mrs. Phynerk went where no Johnson has gone before…..she received her Master's Degree this weekend from Henderson State University. Now I am somewhat like the rock star that was previously called Prince. I am now Mrs. Johnson's husband who was previously called Phynerk. Anyway, I am very proud of her. I also am very pleased to announce that since she is now finished with all the trips to Arkadelphia in the evenings, I can once again eat things that do not fit between two pieces of bread.
Since I'm blogging this from some lonely motel room in Dallas ( sniff…I'm going to yet another software school ) I will share some pictures; maybe a video documentary of the graduation experience with our 'family' when I return to a place called "Hope".

Phynerk

Monday, May 16, 2005
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The greatest...right!

So I'm not sure which is more ridiculous. The fact that Newsweek can print a story that causes the majority of the mulsim world to erupt into violent protests and devastation, or the fact that the muslims want to go to Holy War with the United States over this. Isn't is amazing that the liberal media pulls this crap and then wants to apologize and everything be ok?
"We regret that we got any part of our story wrong, and extend our sympathies to victims of the violence and to the U.S. soldiers caught in its midst," Whitaker wrote in the magazine's latest issue, due to appear on U.S. newsstands on Monday. - Reuters


If only the parishioner of this great religion cared enough about the treatment of their people and the uncontrolled misuse of their religious teachings for terroist acts upon humanity, maybe the world wouldn't look at them as bleeding radicals. As for Newsweek, and the rest of the liberal media, keep it up, and you will only make the wound more infected.

manteca

Friday, May 13, 2005
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It's Official

Now I've seen EVERYTHING. Not that I don't laud these individuals and their cause, I'm just stating a fact. Even someone who uses as many comma splices as me can see at least some value in this society. I'm just wondering how much free time these people have on their hands.


Apostrophe Society



That's all folks,
Jeff C. MCAH

Thursday, May 12, 2005
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Blogger just consumed my post...

And of course I'm too lazy to type it again. So I'll just jump right into it.

A double standard has once again reared its ugly head amongst the dolphin-riders. (We could also call them Morlocks) Apparently, while statues and plaques honoring civil war heroes are racist and devisive, a tax-funded plaque stating that America was better before being settled by European refugees is just a freedom of expression. Take it up with the people in Pasedena. Brought to my attention by the kind folks at Tonguetied.us.

That's all folks.
Jeff C., MCAH

...IDIOT!!

You will not believe who stopped by the office today...


He also let me interview him... Napoleon Interview!

manteca

Tuesday, May 10, 2005
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Officially MCPITNOATIHAROTP...

So Matthew and I are now officially Microsoft Certified Professionals. We are well on our way to fame and glory...and all the trappings that come with. We were so excited when our official Microsoft MCP identification cards came in that we took a picture...


Then we got into a fight...

I'm the red-head... Yes, I did win the fight!

manteca

Like a good neighbor...

In my old age I have been looking a great deal toward the future. You know, retirement... I've discovered that there are many things that will affect my future, but there is one thing in particular: Insurance. Yeah, it's a gamble, one we must all take... for the rest of our lives. We've even got insurance for when we no longer have our lives. Yet how much of this stuff do we really use. The only one normal, sane, heathly people even come close to using fully is health insurance.

When you think about it, insurance sounds like a good thing. Kinda like communism. It would work if people weren't stupid. But we don't live in a perfect world, and there will always be people to sit around and raise the cost of insurance.

In my young days I thought that what people did in the privacy of their own homes was tolerable as long as it didn't affect the rest of us. Well, everything they do affects us. Many would say that the heroin addict shooting up at home is fine as long as he stays there. He's not harming anybody they say, only he is. He's not being a produtive member of society. The guy that smokes 20 packs a day in the smoking section isn't hurting anyone. Wrong! He's gonna die from emphysema when he's forty and up go our life insurance costs. The idiot teenager who runs into the stoplight downtown raises our car insurance costs. I could gone on but this is getting tiring.

To sum up: People are dumb. Thank goodness we're not.

I hear some chocolate milk calling my name...

seashell

Wednesday, May 04, 2005
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A "normal day?"

I was bored (that's really what a normal day is to me) and remembered Mrs. Manteca asking me what my normal day was like this semester. I've got to say, I really don't have a "normal day" as things seem to change at the last minute; usually to the detriment of my paycheck. I'll humor those of you who for some reason still frequent this site with my average "day."

Jeff's Day


Well, for starters lets wake up at 10:00. When you have nothing to do before 10:00, there really is no reason to see those hours of the day. (Don't feed me any of this "wasting the day" stuff... believe me, I wish I had a reason to get up... but I don't.) After my morning routine of waking up, showering, shaving (sometimes), and reading convoginators, I'm ready to face the day. I usually drive to work... which thanks to the lack of traffic at 10:30 in the morning I accomplish this task in just under five minutes.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com


If my students aren't all being wusses and the weather is conducive to educational flying, I'm usually in a plane by 11:00... or 1:00. It really depends on the day. We start each lesson with a preflight briefing and I address any concerns that they may have on my dry erase board. (also, note the picture of me pouring gasoline into a friends car via bucket and funnel)

Image hosted by Photobucket.com


I must say I can't take credit for the Liger, but I have been known to draw Trogdor when teaching S-Turns across a road. Then we throw caution to the wind and take to the sky. In reality, we are quite cautious of the wind, but you get the idea. Then I get to fly over campus and inspect how much of my former dorm they have demolished... it's just about finished. I heard they still charged people for damage to the building before they moved out.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com


After a brief stint in the skies, we return to the ground and I finish out the day waiting for my next student(s) to cancel on me.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com


Tuesdays and Thursdays I teach a class from 12:30 until approximately whenever I feel like it. Afterwards I'll have a quick bite to eat and return to the airport for more waiting and/or flying. Then I go home, watch King of the Hill, the Simpsons, and call it a night.

Jeff C.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005
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Lucky for this guy he wasn't in Florida...

Terry Schiavo never had a chance, but luckily this guy wasn't in Florida.
Naturally I saw this on Fox News. The liberal news wouldn't carry this story...well, they probably would, so that the libs would know where to find him and try to have him starved to death. I'm sure that they are doing it for the "good of humanity."

manteca

Coming This Summer!

I am working on a new film...it will take time. Here is a little teaser...I compare it to the Star Wars Trailer...

Click Here for the Trailer!

manteca

Monday, May 02, 2005
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Halloween 2005

I found my Halloween Costume for this year. I'm thinking about wearing it on the 4th of July also. I tried it on today and took it out for a stroll...


Does it make me look fat?


manteca

Jeff C can do anything

Recently Jeff C. had to do some 'road side' repairs.



It's amazing what a little WD40 can do.

Phynerk

mcgyver escapade

well, i ran out of gas for the first time ever...usually im good about knowing when the camry is gonna lose it, but tonight she suprised me. she's so sexy when she's cunning.

anyway

brian came and picked me up and then we used what we learned at mcgyver school to get some gas in my car...

speaking of which... brian is my homeboy.

anyways, back to the mcgyver stuff we had to do to get the gas in my car...im not sure if youve noticed but inside your gas tank where you put in the nozzle there is a little spring triggered cap thing that keeps gas from sploshing around. Well, since that thing is there, there was no way i was just gonna poor in gas from the extremely full milk carton i had. so brian had the idea of cutting a mountain dew bottle in half and using it as a funnel. good idea on brians part... but what was i gonna cut the bottle in half with? we're not outdoorsmen... we'd have a wireless regular nintendo controller in our car before we'd have a knife... so what did i use?
fingernail clippers... so after accomploshing this task, i tried to put it in the gas tank, BUT it still didnt push that little thing down... so what to do now?

What did eric do?
a)Give Up
b)Let brian do it
c)call gieco to save lots of money on my car insurance
d)manipulate a plastic coat hanger so that i could shove it in the tank to get little piece to stay down.

if you guessed D than your not stupid.

1st rule of mcgyver school: Use a coat hanger and/or duct tape as often as possible.

So we did, and with our powers combined we summoned captain planet and he put miracle gas in my car, and now it can fly...

anyways, brian hooked me up tonight, b/c he was busy studying for his 8oclock am final when i called him, and he came anyway....
i love having real friends... they're few and far between...


 
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